When a person commits a crime, it is expected that he has to live some part of his life in prison and become a prisoner. A prisoner is punished by taking away his freedom. Along with this punishment, his reputation and his old life are stripped away from him.
Love, relationships and marriage are highly affected once a person becomes a prisoner. There is a huge wall that hinders them from seeing each other, and if they do, their time is limited. It is possible that once a person becomes a criminal, his relationships also change. Because of these, the question can a love, relationship, or marriage survive jail often arise in the minds of prisoners.
Relationships in prison that survive
There are several love stories that can tell that love in prison is possible. There are some success stories that love, relationship, or marriage can survive jail.
One of these is the love story between Jeana Ramsey and Edward Johnson. Jeana Ramsey worked as a cook at the Miami Correctional Facility, while Edward Johnson was a prisoner there. The two met at the chow line.
When Edward Johnson was released in 2001, the couple lived together. Even though they have a successful love story, the two had become involved in the murder of two bank tellers, which led them back to prison and serve for several years.
Another successful love story is between Daniel Genis and Petra Szabo. Daniel and Petra met on a subway in 2002 and got married in 2003 to discover that they lied to each other. Petra didn’t know that Daniel was addicted to narcotics and Daniel didn’t know that Petra was 30 years old at that time and not 27. Months after their marriage Daniel Genis was arrested for robbery. Despite being in prison, their communication never stopped. Daniel’s life in prison only made their relationship stronger and it also made them true to each other.
Relationships in prison that did not survive
Even though there are relationships that survive in prison, there are also those that have fallen apart. The most common barrier is the communication. Also, one of the reasons why relationships in prison fail is that the one who is outside is prone to infidelity because of loneliness.
How can a love, relationship, or marriage survive in jail?
There are several ways to make a relationship work despite the fact that one is being held in prison.
1. Use the telephone.
Telephone and letters are the only means of communication available for prisoners. Make use of all the possible modes of communication to talk to each other as often as possible.
2. Don’t let the love die
The one who is left outside can bring his jailbird his favorite food and magazines. He or she can also bring him the things that he or she can legally use inside the correctional to show love and concern.
3. Make plans ahead
Make plans for the future. Create something to look forward to. Make plans on the things that you can do once the loved one is released from jail.
4. Keep memories safe.
Look at the photographs of the husband or the wife while he or she is serving in prison. Daydream about the times being together.
5. Keep busy
Keep oneself busy by striving to become a better person. This applies to both parties. The prisoner may want to use the time while he is in prison to change his life for the better. The one outside may want to earn a degree, learn new things and improve physically.
6. Visit as often as possible
Telephone calls in prison are costly. Sending mails is not enough to feel one’s presence, that is why it is important to visit once in a while.
So can a love, relationship, or marriage survive jail?
There is a possibility for the love to survive jail. There are lots of love stories that succeed beyond the walls of prison, although there are also others have failed. The walls of prison may hinder a relationship or marriage, but if love is strong and true, it will overcome every hindrance along the way.
Although the prospects might seem dim at the time, there is still a way for your love to survive even if your lover or spouse ends up in prison. Naturally, you must primarily feel a deep love and affection for each other even before either one of you ends up behind bars. This way, everything else will seem more bearable. Listed below are a few more tips that can help you cope with the challenging circumstances.
Keep communication lines open
Though it might burn a hole in your pocket at times, accept every collect call that you receive from your loved one. However, if you simply cannot afford those extra expenses while managing your household and keeping your family together as well, you can simply opt to send you messages using the more affordable snail mail.
As a bonus, sending your letters through the post office will give you the opportunity to slip in a few more physical tokens of your affection. Things such as newspaper clippings, magazines, printouts, or possibly even comic books could go a long way in letting your loved one know how much you care about them. If possible, mail one care package every week so that your lover or spouse will always have something to look forward to.
Remember the holidays
Pay special attention to the dates that are significant for both of you. Remember to send a card or simple gift on your loved one’s birthday, your anniversary, Valentine’s Day, as well as on Christmas, and on New Year’s Eve if you cannot visit the prison personally. No matter how small or simple your gift is, he will greatly appreciate the thoughtfulness that you put into looking for that perfect card or writing that touching letter.
Likewise, receiving the replies from your loved one will become even more special since you know how limited he is in terms of resources. Every card will hold an even deeper meaning than you could ever imagine.
Keep the memories alive
Keep mementos such as presents and old photos of your loved one in prominent areas around the house. Place them on your refrigerator, your bedside table, in the living room and any other areas that you frequent. This will make sure that he will always be in your thoughts.
Additionally, send him photos of you and your family as well. The photos will help him reminisce about the good times he spent with you and motivate him to look forward to his release so that he can make even more good memories with you.
Though there will be days when the thought of being apart from your loved one will bring you down, you should always find a way to overcome those minor hurdles. Look forward to each new day since it only brings you closer to the end of his incarceration.
If you have time to spare, try to enroll in various activities or courses to keep your mind and hands busy. Take up a new language, learn a new sport, help out at the community center, or volunteer at the hospital if you can. Enriching yourself while you are also enriching the lives of other people will help to keep your mind off the more negative aspects of being apart from your loved one.